


The Test of Time

by AllStoriesComeFromSomewhere



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Bisexual Bucky Barnes, Bisexual Steve Rogers, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, College Student Peter Parker, Intrusive Thoughts, Light Angst, Love Confessions, M/M, Oblivious Steve Rogers, Original Character(s), Star Wars References, Steve Rogers & Natasha Romanov Friendship, Steve Rogers Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-25
Updated: 2019-01-13
Packaged: 2019-09-17 16:05:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,351
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16977711
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AllStoriesComeFromSomewhere/pseuds/AllStoriesComeFromSomewhere
Summary: Steve has time on his hands. Time to think about his whatever-it-is with Bucky.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This was written post Black Panther and pre-Infinity War, so it’s a bit canon-divergent. Future!verse is based off of my hopes and predictions for further movies. Also, Bucky has TFA hair in this fic, for no other reason than because I love short-haired Bucky.

_ The sounds of water rushed through his ears. All he could see was a blur. His last words to Bucky echoed through his mind.  _

_ “‘Til the end of the line.” _

_ A smile crossed his lips just before he lost consciousness. The water isn’t such a bad thing, he thought. A peaceful place for a peaceful death. His eyelids dropped closed, letting it lull him closer and closer to sleep before— _

_ He gasped, air rushing into his lungs. His eyes snapped back open, blinking the water out of his eyes. Strong arms wrapped around from behind him, pulling him from the depths. They laid him down carefully unto the bank of the river, feeling oddly familiar. As the last of the water exited his throat, his vision returned to him, and for the slightest moment, he was able to see his rescuer. _

_ Bucky.  _

_ His lips opened to call out for him, but a rush of exhaustion overtook him, drowning him completely.  _

_ Steve Rogers passed out on the bank of the Potomac River, rescued by no other than the Winter Soldier.  _

 

That was years ago. Way before Ultron or Thanos or any of this nonsense. Steve had been freshly unfrozen after seventy years, and his first experience in the future was to be the mission of an international assassin, who just so happened to be his best friend. 

Figures. 

Steve sighed. It was now 2022, about eighty years after Howard Stark had promised that all civilians would have flying cars. Granted, he now had an army of helicarriers at his command, but he wasn’t exactly a civilian anymore.

Who would’ve thought that the tiny little kid from Brooklyn who had so many illnesses that he could barely leave the house was destined to be Captain America one day? They taught lessons on him on history classes, inspiring little kids to do things that they thought they’d never do. People are jealous of him, seeing his new body.  _ He must’ve worked out a lot in the 1940s,  _ they whisper when they think he can’t hear them. He just smiles, not telling them that the reason that he was so built was because he was an experiment. He doesn’t tell them about the trauma that came with his name. He doesn’t tell small children that he’s the last person that they want to be like, that he would never wish this kind of suffering upon anyone. They only see the costume, not the mentally tortured man who wears it. 

_ It’s a different era now,  _ he thought, straightening up. All that was left behind. At the moment, it’s the summer of 2022, and his priority is finding the paprika for dinner tonight.

“Hey, Cap.” Steve looked up as Clint walked into the kitchen. “How’s the meatloaf coming?” 

“Can’t find the paprika,” he mumbled.

“Yeah, Wanda was complaining about that a while ago.” He climbed onto the counter and opened a cabinet, grabbing some peanuts from the top shelf. “Pretty sure Vision bought a twenty-four pack and hid it in that cabinet. Didn’t hear it from me, though.”

Grunting his thanks, Steve bent over to take the paprika from the cubbie, coming back up to see that Tony had joined them as well. 

“What’s up, Capsicle?” he mumbled through a mouth full of peanuts. He and Clint both had their hands in the same bag, seemingly having a silent competition over who could fit more nuts in their hand. “Your meatloaf coming along well?”

Ignoring the question, Steve looked around. “Where’s Bucky?” He had gone to the gym with Clint and Tony, and they were both back.

“Relax, Spangly, he just took a bit longer in the showers.” Tony stuffed more peanuts into his mouth. “Can’t be easy getting all the sweat out of a metal arm. I take forever to clean off my suit, and it’s not even attached to me.”

“Sure about that, shellhead?” Clint taunted, snatching the bag from him. Tony jumped off the counter, jumping as high as he could to reach the bag in Clint’s hands. He pushed a button on his wristwatch, activating the Iron Man Gauntlet. 

“Alright then, Robinhood,” he said mockingly, “Let’s see how good your agility is against my technology.”

Clint’s eyes widened for only a moment before he took off, full speed toward the door, with Tony running after him. Steve watched the whole event from the other side of the kitchen, chuckling as Tony attempted to steal the peanuts back.

“Like little kids.”

Bucky was standing in the doorway with only an undershirt on, his metal arm on full display. Steve grinned at him. He was still the same old Bucky who had been with him all those years ago, keeping him out of trouble whenever he picked fights. He could still remember him standing in the 107th Regiment, clear as day. 

_ “‘Til the end of the line.” _

Shaking his head, Steve tilted one of the paprika shakers over the pan. He shook it lightly and absentmindedly, his mind going back to the past. 

_ Gunshots. Metal on metal. Women and children screaming.  _

“Steve.”

_ His heartbeat pounding in his ears, almost loud enough to drown out everything else. _

“Steve.”

_ A colonel shouting out orders to his troops somewhere in the distance.  _

“Steve, that is  _ too much paprika for one meatloaf!” _

Steve jerked back to reality, looking down in dismay. A large spot of red blotted the middle of the loaf, looking like a bullet wound. 

“Well,” he said, looking up at Bucky, who looked disappointed. “Red  _ is  _ my favourite colour.”

“No, it’s not.” Bucky narrowed his eyes, looking right into Steve’s. “Your favourite colour is light blue. Always has been.” He leaned onto the counter. “What’s wrong?”

Steve shifted his eyes away, concentrating on removing some of the powder from the meat. “Nothing. Just...remembering.”

Bucky’s eyes softened. “Steve,” he said gently, “all that is gone now. We’re in a new time. Hell, we’re in a new century.”

Steve sighed. “I know, Buck. I just—” He stopped as Tony walked in, the peanut bag in his hands, now empty.

“Did you guys eat  _ all  _ the peanuts?” Bucky asked incredulously. 

“No,” Tony grumbled. “Big Bird here decided to pull a Katniss and shoot down the whole bag. Now there are lots of peanuts on the floor and no peanuts in my mouth.”

“Well, you and Clint are going to have to clean that up,” Steve told him, rolling his eyes. 

“Don’t have to,” Tony replied, taking a seat. “I’ve got a droid working on that right now. It’s a prototype, though, so it might—“ He was cut off by the blaring sound of the smoke alarm. “Do that,” he sighed, making exaggerated hand gestures. He hopped out of his seat, mumbling something about fried motherboards as he left.

“Hmm,” Steve hummed, turning back around to face Bucky. “Back in our day, we did all the hard work ourselves.”

“Our day was about a hundred years ago, bud,” Bucky laughed. It was a loud, joyous sound, one that vibrated right through Steve’s skin and straight into his heart, warming it up. It was the same laugh that Bucky had before the war, when their biggest concern was not getting caught after pulling a prank. For a long while after his becoming the Winter Soldier, Bucky’s laugh had lost all the spirit that had radiated from it. It had taken Steve a good part of eleven years to build it back up again.

Realising that he was staring, Steve started, aiming his focus back onto the oven. Setting the timer to an hour, he checked his watch.

“Okay, it’s three o’clock right now,” he decided, “So by the time this meatloaf is done, there’ll be two hours ‘til the—” Steve stopped, blinking. He was so lost in thought that he had almost quoted Bucky out loud. “‘Til dinner time,” he finished.

Bucky looked at him strangely. “You sure you’re alright, bud?” he inquired, looking concerned. “You seem a bit...off today.” 

Steve shook his head, trying to clear it out. “Just thinking.”

Just then, Sam walked into the room in full running gear. “Hey, Steve.” Seeing Bucky, he added, “Hello, frosty.” He walked around the counter, getting some crackers from the cupboard. “I’m gonna go out for a quick jog,” he told Steve, pulling out a few crackers. “Wanna come?”

Steve looked over at Bucky, then at the oven. Fifty-seven minutes left.

“Alright, then,” he decided. He could worry about dinner when he got back. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dinner time! Let's see how this goes...

It was six o’clock. Dinner time.

His run with Sam had done very little to clear his mind, but he felt much better when he got back to see that Bucky had taken care of the meatloaf for him.

A surge of affection toward Bucky rushed through him, so strongly that he began to wonder if something was wrong. _He’s my best friend,_ he told himself firmly, but even as these thoughts ran through his mind, he couldn't tear his eyes off of Bucky. _It makes sense._

In a few moments, the living room of Avengers Tower was filled. Tony brought Rhodey and Pepper, Wanda had brought Vision, and Coulson and Fury showed up as well, causing the team to have to pull up a few more chairs. Natasha and Clint were bickering about attack strategies while Coulson attempted to make a compromise. Peter and Bruce came in late, Bruce in a lab coat and Peter holding a stack of biology textbooks. The room was full of laughter from everyone, and the warmth that radiated off of everyone was palpable. It was one of the very rare occasions where the Avengers could all get together and enjoy themselves.

Steve sat next to Bucky, watching as he argued playfully with Sam about hockey. Bucky had always loved to talk with exaggerated facial expressions and hand gestures, so in mimicking a move from one of the games with his fork, he accidentally launched a piece of the meatloaf onto himself. The table erupted into a bout of laughter, Bucky cursing under his breath. Steve’s face was bright pink from laughing so hard, eventually calming down enough to help Bucky.

“Here,” he said, pulling a handkerchief from his pocket. “Let me help.” He concentrated on wiping the sauce from his face, eyes flitting up to see Bucky looking at him with a look in his eyes—adoration, maybe. _No way,_ Steve thought to himself, _we’re just friends._ But even as he assured himself, he couldn’t pull his gaze away from Bucky’s eyes.

“Oh, just kiss already,” Tony called from the other end of the table. Steve’s eyes widened slightly as he glanced towards Tony, but he fought his embarrassment down, instead looking at Tony disapprovingly. Bucky, however, was glaring at Tony with an intensity that could’ve melted a hole in the wall. What happened next was unpredictable by anyone.

They were kissing. In one, fluid motion, Bucky had leaned over and was now kissing Steve fiercely. Their lips fit into each other perfectly, as if they were two pieces of a set, Bucky cold against Steve’s warm mouth. His fingers caressed Steve’s face softly, as if handling a china doll. All the thoughts that had been swirling around in his brain were now drowned out by one.

_Bucky Barnes is kissing me._

The moment was gone as quickly as it had started. Bucky pulled away, leaving Steve in a daze. His thoughts were muddled for a moment before he realised that his friends were cheering. Clint and Natasha clapped in the background while Fury begrudgingly handed ten dollars to a smirking Tony. Steve blushed slightly, looking down so that the others wouldn’t see. “Took you long enough,” Clint whistled. Steve spent the whole rest of dinner wishing he could just disappear.

The night consisted of Steve tossing and turning in his bed, unable to stop thinking about the kiss. _12:00._ His beautiful chocolate brown eyes. _1:00._ The controlled intensity he used in the moment. _2:00._ His stubble soft against Steve’s smooth face. _3:00_ . His fingers softly brushing his cheeks. _4:00._ The passion that was felt through the whole thing.

 _It was just a challenge,_ Steve tried to convince himself. _He did it to shut Tony up._ It was the only logical explanation, after all, but there was a still small but existent part of his mind that wished otherwise.

 

✮✮✮✮✮✮

 

The next morning went on as usual. Steve woke up late, so nobody was in the kitchen when he came down. He poured himself a bowl of cereal, yawning distractedly. He had barely gotten five hours of sleep last night since he was thinking so much about dinner.

_Dinner._

_Bucky._

_The kiss._

Everything came rushing back, pushing all the sleepiness out of Steve’s mind. _He kissed me._

Steve shook his head, as if the thoughts were physical things that could be thrown off. He turned around to open the fridge, only to see big brown eyes staring back at him. Bucky smiled, stepping out of the way.

“Hey, Stevie,” he said freely. “What’s for breakfast?”

Steve smiled. Bucky’s atmosphere had changed from a serious one to an airier one, just like it had been before the wars. But what had changed since yesterday?

_The kiss._

Steve’s smile faltered for only a moment before he plastered it back on. “Well, I don’t know about you, but I’m having cereal.”

“That’s okay,” Bucky replied playfully. “I’ll just steal some from your bowl.”

The carefree nature of his voice surprised a genuine laugh out of Steve. “Oh, no, you don’t.” Quickly grabbing some milk from the fridge and pouring it into his bowl, he held the bowl against his chest, eating quickly. Bucky leaned over and kept trying to steal a spoon, but Steve stepped away every time. Eventually they were running circles around the island, laughing all the way. After about three minutes, Bucky had trapped Steve between his arms and the counter. Grinning, he leaned in closer to the bowl. Closer to Steve.

_Bucky._

_Dinner._

_The kiss._

A loud clatter was heard as the bowl slipped through Steve’s fingers, milk spilling all over himself and Bucky. Bucky jumped back, looking down in dismay at his ruined shirt.

“What happened, Steve?” he asked, attempting to rub some of the milk off.

“I—” Steve looked down at the spill, then back up at Bucky. His cheeks coloured slightly as he processed everything. He shook his head again. “Sorry, Buck. I don’t know what’s gotten into me lately.”

Bucky’s eyes softened. “Stevie, if you need to talk—”

“ _No._ ” Steve said quickly. Too quickly. “I mean, no, it’s alright. I’m good, I just—I just need some air.” With that, he hastily left the room, leaving a bewildered Bucky to clean up his mess.

 

✮✮✮✮✮✮

 

“Steven Grant Rogers, I swear on your shield, if you do not let me in I will knock down this door.”

Steve sighed, burying his face deeper into his pillow. Natasha had been trying to get him to talk for about ten minutes now.

“F.R.I.D.A.Y., open this door right now.”

“I’m sorry, Miss Romanoff, but Captain Rogers has not given you clearance to enter his room.”

Good old F.R.I.D.A.Y.

“Clearance my—”

“Let her in, F.R.I.D.A.Y.,” Steve called, sitting up. The door clicked unlocked as Natasha appeared behind it.

“‘Has not given you clearance’,” she mimicked, setting herself down on the bed next to Steve. “I thought the level system crashed when S.H.I.E.L.D. did the first time.”

“The numbers did. Now we have colours.”

Natasha rolled her eyes. “And now I need clearance to talk to my friends?” Steve smiled slightly.

“Well, S.H.I.E.L.D. wouldn’t exactly be S.H.I.E.L.D. without their secrets.”

“Speaking of secrets.” Natasha readjusted herself so that she was looking right at him. “Care to tell me why you’re holed up in here?”

Steve sighed. “I just—I don’t know.” He ran his hand frustratedly through his hair, thinking. “So many things have changed. I know it’s been a long time since I escaped the ice, but I still feel like there’s so much to catch up with.”

“Steve.” He looked to see a sympathetic looking Natasha. “Maybe it’s not everything else you have to catch up with. Maybe it’s yourself.”

Steve’s brows knotted into each other. “What?”

“Steve, how much time have you had to yourself since you came out of the ice?” Her eyes bore deep into his. “Now that everything has calmed down a bit, you might wanna spend some time getting to know yourself better. Make sure the guy who came out of the ice is the same guy that went in.”

Steve thought about that. She was right. There were very few moments in the last ten years in which he wasn’t saving the world. Maybe he should spend some time with himself. “Thanks, ‘Tasha,” he said, smiling gratefully. She smiled back, then got up, walking toward the door. She paused, stopping in the doorframe. “Oh, and Cap?” She turned around to look straight at him. “Maybe you should talk to Bucky, too. You know, what with the shared experiences and what not.” With that, she left, the door clicking shut behind her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...will Steve take Natasha's advice? Will he stuff his emotions away? The suspense!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late update...returning to school has been quite a hassle. Anyway, enjoy!

The day was going great. Steve had elected to take Natasha’s advice seriously and have the day to himself. He had decided that the best place to start was his oh, so lengthy pop culture list. He was currently in the middle of Episode IV of the Star Wars series. 

“ _ I’ve been waiting for you, Obi-Wan. We meet again, at last. The circle is now complete. When I left you, I was but the learner— _ ”

“—now I am the master.”

Steve looked over to see Bucky leaning in the doorframe, watching the screen. He turned to Steve and smiled. 

“Shuri made me watch a bunch of new movies while I was in Wakanda,” he explained. “She said it was ‘integral to my adjustment into this century’.”

Steve laughed, fumbling around for the remote. He paused the TV, freezing Darth Vader in a strange position. “So what’s up?”

“Just wanted to see where you went,” Bucky replied. His voice sounded strange, as if he was speaking with a sort of forced nonchalance. Catching this, Steve studied him closely, raising an eyebrow. Bucky smiled awkwardly, his hand raising to scratch behind his ear. It was a tic that he’d had since they were kids, usually reserved for talking up pretty girls.

“I’ve been trying to catch up on my list,” Steve explained. He looked down at his lap for a moment, contemplating, before making a decision. “Do you wanna join me?”

Bucky looked briefly startled before nodding his head. Steve moved over so that Bucky would have space next to him. There they sat, on the bed with their backs on the wall, watching the TV. Their legs stretched parallel to the headboard at first, but after a while they ended up tangled into each other. It was like they were back to the old days, just sixteen-year- old boys in Brooklyn, sharing a blanket and watching the black and white Disney films. Back then, they crowded each other out of necessity, so that Steve could absorb Bucky’s body heat and wouldn’t get too cold. Now they were just doing it for the comfort. That’s what it was. They were two best friends, seeking comfort in each other’s understanding.  _ Right? _

 

✮✮✮✮✮✮

 

Steve woke up to his pillow harder than usual. Eyes still closed, he vaguely wondered why it was so firm before he heard a soft thumping coming from it.  _ A heartbeat.  _ Eyes flying open, he propped himself up, accidentally stabbing Bucky with his elbow. 

“ _ Ow… _ ” Bucky groaned.

“Sorry,” Steve murmured. Rolling over, he sat himself up at the edge of the bed. The TV was still playing, Obi-Wan Kenobi fighting someone on the screen. Steve wondered briefly what was going on before he realised that he must have slept through at least three of the movies before this one. 

Behind him, Bucky sighed, then proceeded to sit up tiredly. “Good morning to you, too.”

Steve just stared at him.

_ Bucky and I fell asleep in my bed.  _

This was normal. They had done it thousands of times. 

_ BuckyandIfellasleepinmybed.  _

This was completely and utterly normal. They were best friends. 

_ BuckyandIfellasleepinmybedBuckyandIfellasleepinmybedBuckyandIfellasleepinmy— _

“Stevie?”

Steve blinked, pulled out of his head by Bucky’s hand waving in front of his face. The brunet was looking at him expectantly. “Sorry, what?” Steve asked, rubbing tiredly at his eyes. Bucky tilted his head, looking concerned. It was adorable, really, the light from the window making his eyes—

_ No.  _

“I was asking if you wanted to go out today,” Bucky explained. “There’s a festival going on in town and I was wondering if you wanted to come with me.”

Steve blinked again. He and Bucky. At a festival. In town. Together. Like a da—

_ NO. _

“Sure, Buck,” the blond said, smiling. The worry in Bucky’s face immediately evaporated, face lit up by an ebullient grin.

“Great,” he beamed. “Let’s freshen up, and then we can go.”

With that, he bounced off to his own room to wash up, leaving Steve alone in his room. He smiled fondly, heart full of endearment, before he turned and collapsed onto his bed. A whole day with his best friend in a date-like setup.  _ Why did I agree to this? _

Natasha’s words came floating back to him.  _ ‘Maybe you should talk to Bucky, too. You know, what with the shared experiences and what not.’ _

He stood back up. A whole day. With Bucky. He could do this.

Feuling himself with determination, he marched over to his washroom and stared at his reflection with steely resolve. “I am  _ going _ to spend the day at a festival with my best friend.” His stomach fluttered with butterflies as he said it. 

Why was he being like this? It wasn’t as if they hadn’t hung out before. 

An image of Bucky laughing flashed in his mind.

Cheeks colouring, he forced the thought down and turned on the sink. 

 

✮✮✮✮✮✮

 

“Steve look at this! They’ve got little helicarriers that you can fly with a  _ remote _ !” Steve walked over to where Bucky was marvelling at a display at a toy stand, grinning at the brunet’s fascination. He was squatting slightly to look at a package, the baseball cap he wore doing little to cover the childlike wonder on his face. 

“Eighty years and you’re still the biggest geek I know,” Steve teased. In response, Bucky grinned and leaned over conspiratorially.

“Don’t tell anyone, Stevie. Still got a rep to uphold.”

Steve puffed out a light laugh, a small corner of his mind flustered at how close Bucky was. “Hate to break it to ya, Buck, but I think your rep died when you took us on a double date to Howard Stark’s World’s Fair for  _ fun _ .”

Bucky made a small noise of dissent, then went back to watching the attendee display the toy helicopter.

“Anything I can help you guys with?” Steve turned around to see a short, blonde girl in a uniform smiling at them.

“No, thank you, we’re just looking,” he said politely. She quirked an eyebrow, still smiling.

“Really? Because if you want one, the helicopters are only $20 today.” She addressed them both, but had her body turned slightly more toward Bucky. Steve felt a slight twinge in his stomach, but kept his smile plastered on his face. Why did this girl make him so uneasy?

Bucky stood up straight and turned toward her, grinning. “And if we’re unwilling to pay that price?” he asked playfully. 

The girl’s smile grew even more. “Well, I’m sure there are other ways you could pay,” she purred, looking up at him salaciously. 

Steve froze. They were  _ flirting _ . He was standing  _ right there  _ and they were  _ flirting _ . 

This shouldn’t bother him. He’d often been on the sidelines of Bucky’s advances when they were teenagers. He knew how this went down.  _ So why do I feel so bad? _

The sound of Bucky’s laughter shook him out of his shock, though his tension remained.

“So, dinner tomorrow at the Salt and Pepper?” the girl was asking, flirtatiously. Steve suddenly felt a surge of resentment toward her.  _ Can’t she see he’s with me? _

“Sorry, doll, but I’m actually here with someone already,” Bucky laughed, winking at Steve. The girl seemed confused for a moment before looking over at Steve. Understanding dawned on her face. 

“Oh. _ Oh. _ You guys are—you’re— _ oh _ .” Her eyes widened substantially, suddenly looking very guilty. “And I was—right in front of—I am so,  _ so _ sorry.”

The tension slowly melted out of him as Steve chuckled, shaking his head at the floor. “It’s perfectly alright, ma’am.” The motion of his looking back up at her pushed his baseball cap slightly upwards, giving her a better view of his face. If it were possible, her eyes seemed to widen even more.

“Oh my god,” she whispered, mortified. “Oh my  _ god _ . I just tried to steal  _ Captain America’s man. _ ” She then proceeded to fall to her knees, burying her face in her hands, the absolute picture of embarrassment.

Bucky doubled over laughing right in the middle of the street. Steve let out another short chuckle before bending down to take the girl in his arms. “Hey, it’s all good,” he soothed, rubbing her shoulder assuringly.

The girl smiled, though still looking suitably embarrassed. “Sorry for ruining your date,” she apologised, shuffling her feet awkwardly.

A ping went off in Steve’s head, but he ignored it. “You didn’t ruin anything,” he assured. 

“Yeah,” Bucky supplemented, wiping tears from his eyes. “Stevie and I were just looking around, anyway.”

The blonde let out a little giggle, causing Steve to smile and let her go. She stood up and pushed her hair behind her ears. “Right, well, I’ve got to get back to my boss, but have fun on the rest of your date.” With that, she gave a small wave and walked away quickly, fidgeting with her hair the whole way. 

“Well, Steve,” Bucky announced, swinging his arm around the blond’s shoulders, “how about we grab some cotton candy from that cart over there and look around some more, then be on our way back?”

Steve looked at Bucky adoringly, a surge of affection coursing through him. “Sure, Buck.”

Time stopped for just a moment. He leaned in slightly toward the brunet, breath catching in his throat. Bucky seemed to lean in as well, the two getting closer and closer, Steve’s eyes flickering towards the other’s lips before—

Steve cleared his throat, turning away. “Yeah, let’s go.”

A moment of surprise flickered across Bucky’s face before it disappeared. “Yeah. Alright.” His seemed a bit awkward—disappointed, maybe? 

_ No.  _ Steve pushed the thought firmly out of his mind. 

“So what colour cotton do you want?” he asked, trying to restore the playful air. 

“Hmm.” Bucky tilted his head back, exaggerating a gesture of thinking. “I think I’ll take the blue.” Steve’s eyebrows knit together. 

“And why is that?” he wondered, trying to catch up on Bucky’s joke. 

Eyes sparkling, Bucky grinned at him. “Can’t just not get something that looks just like your eyes, can I, Stevie?”

Steve snorted. Covering his face with his hands. “You’re such a sap, Buck.”

“I’m  _ your _ sap, though, Steve,” Bucky replied, laughing. 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, here we go again...

When they got back to the tower, it was 11:00 at night, and everyone else in the tower was asleep. The two had to stifle their laughter the whole way up to their floor, so as not to wake anyone. When they got there, Bucky collapsed onto Steve’s bed. 

“Stevie,” he groaned. “I really shouldn’t have eaten all that candy corn.”

Steve laughed. “I told you, ya big lump. You probably should have stopped after your fourth packet.”

“You shouldn’t have expected me to have any kind of self-control when candy was involved,” Bucky complained into a pillow. 

Steve grinned. “Didn’t have it then, definitely don’t have it now.” He walked over to the edge of the bed and thought for a moment. “There are some Tums in the kitchen, those should help.”

“But the kitchen is three floors down,” Bucky whined, removing his face from the pillow to look at Steve. “Could you get some for me,” he pleaded, looking at Steve with his best puppy dog eyes.

Sighing, Steve nodded. “Alright. I’ll get them, but you better not be asleep by the time I get back.”

Bucky nodded sleepily before jerking his head back up, forcing his hooded eyes back open. “Yeah, sure. I mean, I make no promises, but yeah. Okay.” He then proceeded to rub his eyes in a vain attempt to stay awake. 

Shaking his head, Steve started on the way down. It was a fairly simple journey. Take the elevator down three floors. Steve’s mind, however, decided it was too simple, and decided to replay the events of the day in his head. 

_ Bucky and I went out on a date.  _

The thought was so sudden that Steve’s legs locked for a moment in surprise.  _ What? _ He shook his head.  _ No.  _

_ He introduced me as his date.  _

_ No. He told the girl that he was with someone. I’m his friend.  _

_ He didn’t contradict her when she thought you were on a date.  _

_ Neither did I, for that matter.  _

_ “I’m  _ your _ sap, Steve.” _

The  _ ping _ of the elevator reaching its floor shook Steve out of his whirlpool of thoughts long enough for him to force them away. Shaking his head firmly, he stepped into the hall that led to the kitchen. A faint light was coming from around the corner, making him stop for a moment in confusion. Turning the corner, he saw Peter sitting on the counter, eating cereal from a saucepan. 

“Hey, Mr. Rogers,” Peter greeted, giving a small wave. Mouth full of Cheerios and bags under his eyes, he looked like he hadn’t slept in days. 

“Hey, Peter.” Steve had long since given up on trying to get Peter to use his familiar name, understanding that the kid would never grow out his formality. “You look tired.”

Peter snorted, a few Cheerios flying out of his mouth. “Understatement of the year.” Spooning a few final Cheerios into his mouth, he hopped off the counter and put the empty saucepan in the sink. “So I heard you and Mr. Barnes went out on a date today.”

“It wasn’t a date,” Steve said unsurely, as if he weren’t sure whether he was telling Peter or convincing himself. 

Peter stopped and stared at him. “You went to a festival with your best friend, who you’ve been with for over a century, the dude who you’d rather die than even scratch when he was brainwashed, and you spent the whole day there. Yeah. Totally not a date.” He turned around, proceeding to wash the saucepan and put it away. “So, how was the festival? I heard they had a great tech display.”

Steve smiled, remembering. He hadn’t actually paid much attention to the display itself, but more to Bucky’s adorable fascination with it. 

Flushing, Steve cleared his throat. “Yeah, it was nice,” he agreed, rubbing the back of his neck. “What about you? How’s your studying going?”

At this, the boy let out an exaggerated sigh. “Well, I haven’t slept in two weeks and I’ve been eating packaged food for three, but I’m more than fifty per cent done studying for my molecular bio exam, so that’s a plus.”

Steve gave a sympathetic hum as he opened a cabinet. When he turned around, Peter had returned to an open textbook on the counter. “Don’t study too hard kid,” he said softly, smiling. “Don’t wanna wring yourself dry.”

Peter smiled back tiredly, then continued to turn his eyes back to his book. Finding the Tums, Steve ruffled the kid’s hair as he walked by. Just as he was about to turn the corner, he heard a thump from behind him. He turned to see that Peter had fallen asleep, his face pressed against his open textbook. 

Smiling lightly, the blond picked Peter up in his arms and gently laid him down on the sofa on the other side of the room. Closing the boy’s textbook, he retrieved a blanket from the closet in the hall and spread it over him. After ensuring that the kid would be comfortable, he turned off the lights and stepped into the elevator.

He was one floor away from reaching his room before the elevator stopped. Natasha stepped in and slammed the halt button.

“‘Tasha, what—” Steve began confusedly.

“You thought you could go on a date with Bucky and not tell me all about it the minute you got back?” she demanded, pointing her finger accusingly. 

“It wasn’t a date,” Steve protested. “I don’t know why everyone thinks that. We just hung out at the festival.”

Natasha narrowed her eyes. “You went to the festival with your best friend, Bucky, who took care of you back in the 40s, remembered you even after his mind was ripped to shreds over and over until he couldn’t remember himself, and kissed you over the dinner table the other day, and you didn’t think it was a date?”

Steve opened his mouth, but no words came out. 

_ Bucky and I went out on a date.  _

“We…”

_ “I’m  _ your _ sap, Steve.” _

“Oh. My. God.” Natasha dragged her hand down her face. “I thought you were just  _ pretending _ to be oblivious. You actually didn’t know?”

Still lacking the ability to form words, Steve numbly shook his head. 

_ He didn’t contradict her when she thought you were on a date.  _

_ Because he thought you were.  _

“Oh,” Steve whispered. “ _ Oh. _ ”

“Yeah, ‘ _ oh _ ’. You seriously couldn’t see it?”

“He…” _ Likes me.  _

“Loves you, yes.”

_ Loves me.  _

“Oh.”

“Steve, you know there are other words than just ‘oh’.”

“Sorry, I—” Steve stopped. Taking a deep breath in, he attempted to gather his thoughts. “A girl flirted with him while we were there.”

“ _ What? _ ” Natasha shouted. “While you were  _ there _ ?”

“Yeah, but,” Steve took another breath. “But he told her he was with me. I thought he meant…I thought he meant as my friend. I didn’t think we could be together in that way.”

“Steve.”

Steve looked up to see the redhead looking at him with sad eyes. 

“How did you feel when she flirted with him?” she asked softly. 

The blond frowned, thinking. “I felt...bad. Like I was looked over. Like...like he chose her over me,” he said quietly. 

“And would you like for him to have chosen you instead?”

“Yes,” Steve answered without hesitating. He frowned. “I mean no. I didn’t feel bad when he flirted when we were kids. Why would I want him now?”

“Maybe,” Natasha started gently, “you told yourself back then that you couldn’t have him. You both did grow up with the norms of the 40s. And now that you’ve both woken up in a different era, maybe some part of you has realised that you  _ can _ have him now.”

Steve took a moment to process this information. “So…I’m in love with my best friend.” The words felt odd in his mouth, like they were bouncing around, trying to fit in. 

Natasha perked up. “Are you?” she teased. “One date and you’re already confessing your love. Who knew the great Captain America was so easy?”

“Shut up,” Steve laughed softly, blushing. Natasha’s eyes softened. 

“I’m glad you’re happy, Steve,” she said sincerely. Pressing a button, she undid the halt on the elevator. Smacking the blond on the shoulder, she said, “Now go get your man.”

Grinning, Steve watched as she stepped out of the elevator and back into her floor. Once the elevator began to move, he raised his eyes to the ceiling. 

_ I’m in love with my best friend.  _

Just the thought filled him with glee. 

“I’m in love with my best friend,” he announced to the empty lift, testing the words on his tongue. The sound alone made him want to laugh out loud. 

“I’m in love with Bucky Barnes,” he whispered as the doors of the elevator slid open. 

When he walked into his room, Bucky was fast asleep on his bed. He obviously hadn’t been able to stick to his word and stay awake, but that didn’t bother Steve in the slightest. His heart swelled at the sight of Bucky curled up around his pillow, looking for all the world like he belonged there. Grinning, he joined the brunet on the bed, curling his body so that his head lay right next to Bucky’s. In response to the shift in the mattress caused by Steve’s weight, Bucky shifted so that his legs intertwined with the blond’s, throwing his arm over the other. 

_ I’m in love with my best friend.  _

That night, Steve fell asleep smiling, cradled in the body of the man he loved. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this chapter is kind of long, but I just couldn't choose between Natasha and Peter. So, like the bi that I am, I chose both XP .


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter, guys. *cracks knuckles* Let's do this.

The next morning, Steve woke up with his face in the crook of Bucky’s neck. He blinked for a moment, confused, then the memories of yesterday flooded back to him. 

_ I’m in love with my best friend.  _

He opened his eyes to see Bucky sleeping peacefully on his back. His brows were slightly furrowed, lips turned upwards.  _ Adorable. _

A feeling of giddiness flooded his body as he pressed closer, tangling himself further into his best friend. 

His leg rubbed slightly against Bucky’s thigh, making Bucky groan softly. Bringing his arm up, he rubbed his face, eying Steve suspiciously. “You’re happy,” he said slowly. Steve grinned. 

“I talked to ‘Tasha last night,” he told him. Bucky frowned. 

“No, you were with me last night. We…” he trailed off, trying to remember. An expression of guilt crossed his face. “I fell asleep on you, didn’t I?”

Steve chuckled softly. “Yeah, you did. It’s fine, though.”

“No, it’s not,” Bucky denied. “I’m sorry. I should’ve at least tried.”

Steve rolled his eyes. “Always with the unreasonable guilt. It’s okay, Buck. Really.”

The brunet nodded, but still looked unconvinced. “So, what’d you talk to Natasha about?”

Steve traces circles on Bucky’s shoulder, feeling the cool metal underneath the short sleeves of his t-shirt.

_ “He…” _

_ “Loves you, yes.” _

“You,” he said honestly. Bucky quirked a brow. 

“Me?” he asked, jokingly. “What, you were gossiping about how good my arm feels?”

The blond snorted. “Yup. Looks, smells, feels, the whole nine.”

“Alright, well,” Bucky started, attempting to sit up, “I’m going to go freshen up, and then you can tell me all about your little chat and why you’re so cheery today.”

Steve groaned. “But Bucky,” he complained, “if you get up, then I’ll have to get up, too.” He looked at the brunet mischievously. “But if you stay,” he suggested playfully, “I’ll have an excuse not to.”

Laughing, Bucky flipped them both over so that he was looming over the blond. “Alright,” he countered, “only if you tell me why you’re so happy.” 

Steve momentarily lost focus, instead getting caught up in the intimacy of the position. Breath catching in his throat, he thought for a moment. “Hmm,” he hummed. “Well, I ran into Peter last night in the kitchen.” He paused.

Bucky nodded, coaxing him further.

“And, well,” Steve stopped.  _ What if Natasha was wrong? _ he thought.  _ What if he doesn’t love me back? _

“It’s nothing,” he mumbled, looking away. Bucky rolled back onto the bed, puzzled.

“Stevie,” he said gently, pulling the blond’s eyes back to him. His eyes softened considerably. “I don’t know why you’re suddenly upset, but I’m going to go have a wash. When I get back, we’re going to talk about this.”

Steve nodded numbly. 

Bucky searched his face for another moment before straightening up. Giving Steve one last concerned look, he padded out of the room.

As soon as the brunet was gone, Steve slumped against the wall behind his bed.  _ All Natasha proved was that I love him, _ he thought bitterly.  _ Not that he loves me. _

He wasn’t really sure where this notion had come from. The thought had just inserted itself into his mind, and now was firmly planted. 

Defeatedly, he forced himself out of bed and made his way to his bathroom. He moved through his morning routine, going through the motions slowly. 

Flush. Wash. Brush. Toothpaste. Spit. 

Looking up at himself in the mirror, he was vaguely surprised at how forlorn he looked. He looked considerably more awake, but his hair was still rumpled from his sleep, and his eyes refused to brighten up. 

Sighing, he splashed his face with water twice before drying it off with a towel. He wasn’t in the mood to put any effort into anything else. 

When he opened the bathroom door again, Bucky was sitting cross-legged on his freshly made bed. 

“Feeling better?” he asked softly. Without answering, Steve walked over and threw himself into Bucky’s arms. Bucky reflexively wrapped his arms around the blond, giving him a reassuring squeeze.

They sat like that for a while, exchanging body heat in silence. At some point, Bucky had turned on the TV, resuming the Star Wars movie they were watching. Steve watched with a sort of detached interest as Luke and co. escaped, letting tears stream down his face freely when Obi-Wan sacrificed himself.

“Stevie?” Bucky murmured gently, rubbing the blond’s arm in a soothing manner. “You wanna talk about what’s bothering you?”

In response, Steve buried his head into the brunet’s torso, as if he could hide in there. 

Letting out a soft chuckle, Bucky propped himself against the wall with his metal arm. “Alright, Stevie,” he grunted, pulling the blond man closer against him. “We are  _ going _ to talk about this, so you might as well make it easy on yourself and start it off.”

Steve mumbled nonsensically into Bucky’s shirt, burrowing deeper into his warmth. 

“Okay,” Bucky started slowly, “does it have anything to do with what you and Natasha talked about yesterday?”

Hesitantly, Steve nodded. 

“What about your conversation with Peter?”

He nodded again, the fabric of Bucky’s clothing rubbing softly against his face. 

Bucky hummed thoughtfully. “Well, you were happy about it this morning. So was it really that bad or is this just an endorphin crash?”

Steve looked up at him questioningly. “Didn’t think you’d be familiar with the concept of an endorphin crash,” he said lightly. Bucky smiled. 

“I have dated people before, Steve,” he reminded him. “I know how this works.”

Though it was well-meant, the thought of Bucky dating someone else immediately sent Steve back into his depressive spiral. He once again engulfed himself into Bucky’s arms, looking for warmth he knew he couldn’t keep. 

_ How could he ever love me? _ he thought ruefully.  _ He could have anyone.  _

_ Why would he choose me? _

“Steve.”

Bucky had regained the concerned look on his face, looking down at Steve worriedly. He moved so that his back was against the wall behind Steve’s bed, pulling Steve into a half sitting position in his lap. “What’s wrong?” he asked again, attempting to coax an answer out of the blond. 

The intimacy of the position sent jolts up Steve’s legs, followed by a twinge in his chest. “I—”

The thought of this posture being shared with someone else caused pangs of sadness in Steve’s chest, pushing him forward. Taking a deep breath, he started. 

“Bucky…there’s something I gotta say. And I need you to let me say it okay? After I’m done—well after I’m done if you never want me to say another thing to you then that’s okay but…I gotta say it, at least just this once.”

Bucky’s brows furrowed in confusion, but he nodded silently, coaxing Steve onward.

“I—” He shifted so that his legs were on either side of his friend, now able to fully look at him. 

His dark hair was combed back, sweeping upwards in a sort of dishevelled wave. He couldn’t have possibly shaved in the short amount of time that Steve was in the bathroom, so he had a bit of stubble scattered across his cheeks and jaw, bringing out the chocolate of his eyes. He had changed into a comfy blue sweatshirt, small flecks of silver weaved through the loops, accentuating the steel of his hand. His brows were slightly knitted together, confused, and his lips were curved downwards a little. All in all, he was absolutely adorable. 

Taking another deep breath, he began. 

“Bucky, you’ve been my best friend for almost a century. Literally. We’ve been together through thick and thin, wet and dry. You’ve always been there for me, through every stupid idea I ever had. You’ve actually died for me, and I would do the same for you without question. Ever since we were teenagers, you’ve looked out for me, even after I picked every fight I could and couldn’t. You know everything about me: my mum’s name was Sarah and I wore newspapers in my shoes.”

Bucky smiled fondly at the memory. “Okay…” he encouraged, pushing him onwards.  Steve smiled, butterflies flapping harshly in his stomach. He continued.

“I don’t know where I would be today if it weren’t for you, or even if I would be alive. I don’t know if I could have possibly been able to get through even half of the things we’ve done in this century without you. I do know that there is no one I would rather be with than you.” He paused, closing his eyes. 

“James Buchanan Barnes. I am utterly and irrefutably in love with you.”

Silence. 

Opening his eyes, Steve saw Bucky looking at him with watery eyes and a cheek-splitting grin. The brunet seemed to be about to burst with emotion. A laugh escaped him, surprising Steve. Laughs continuing to tumble out of him, he leaned his head back on the wall and covered his face with his hands. Steve frowned.

“What?” he asked, rubbing his arms self-consciously. 

“ _ Steve _ ,” Bucky gasped between laughs. “Steve, I  _ kissed _ you at dinner the other day. Could I possibly be any more obvious?”

“I thought you were just trying to annoy Tony,” Steve protested, looking away, cheeks burning.  

“We went on a  _ date _ yesterday, Stevie!”

“So it  _ was _ a date!”

“Of  _ course  _ it was a date! What did you think it was?”

“I don’t know! I thought we were just hanging out!” Steve buried his face in his hands, embarrassed.

“Yeah, Steve. I took you to a festival so that we could ‘hang out’.”

This startled a laugh out of Steve. Now they were both cracking up, Steve straddling Bucky while both laughing maniacally. 

Amidst their laughter, Bucky grabbed Steve’s hips and pulled him closer, crashing their lips together. 

This kiss wasn’t like the one over the dinner table, controlled and orderly. No, this one was fast and spontaneous, driven with the passion of a thousand burning suns. It was fueled by the memories of longing, affection, and missed opportunities. It was heated and fiery, both participants tired of waiting and just taking, taking,  _ taking _ . 

“I love you, too, Stevie,” Bucky whispered when they finally broke apart. Those five words filled Steve with glee, another bout of laughter bursting out of him. He kissed Bucky again, relishing the feeling of being allowed. 

“So, you gonna tell me about your conversation with Natasha or do I just have to guess?” Bucky asked between kisses. 

“Hmm,” Steve hummed against Bucky’s mouth. “Well, we did talk about you,” he confessed. “And about our date.”

“Yeah?” Bucky prompted. “Anything else?”

“And about the festival.”

“Mhmm.”

“And about how much I love you.”

Bucky smiled against the blond’s mouth. He pushed Steve off his lap so that he bounced onto the mattress, leaning over him on all fours. 

“Say again,” he commanded, kissing down Steve’s neck.

“I love you,” Steve gasped. “I love you I love you I love you.”

The brunet leaned over to press his lips back against Steve’s. The blond reached up and wrapped his arms around the other’s neck, pulling him closer. They kissed fiercely and passionately, as if the moment they let go, they would lose each other. 

“Well, I came up to see if you guys wanted to have some fun, but it looks like you got that taken care of.”

The two started, breaking apart to see Natasha leaning against the doorframe. 

“And I understand I have you to thank for this,” Bucky replied, recovering first. Steve laughed. 

“I got my man,” he said told her, winking. Natasha snorted. 

“Right, well, when you guys are done sucking face, there’s lunch in the kitchen.”

As soon as she said it, both Steve’s and Bucky’s stomachs rumbled loudly. Looking at the clock that hung on the wall, Steve saw that it was nearly a quarter after one. Looking back at Bucky, he saw a guilty expression covering the brunet’s face. 

“I completely forgot about breakfast,” he said apologetically. Steve rolled his eyes. 

“It’s fine, Buck,” he said. “Besides,” he added, smirking, “if we had eaten breakfast, we wouldn’t have gotten to this point, would we?”

Bucky grinned, pressing another, more chaste kiss to the blond’s lips. 

“Still here, you know,” Natasha called, waving at them. Laughing, the two stood up and followed her out the door.

Once in the corridor, Steve felt a cool weight in his hand. Looking down, he saw Bucky’s metal fingers intertwined with his own. Turning toward him, Steve saw the brunet look down bashfully. Smiling, Steve gave his hand a reassuring squeeze.

“I’m glad I get to be with you now,” Bucky murmured once got onto the elevator. Steve grinned.

“I’m always with you, Buck,” he replied as the elevator reached the kitchen floor. “‘Til the end of the line.”

Their lips met once again as the doors to the lift slid open, the cheering of their friends acting as background noise in the first moment of the rest of their lives. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooooo... what do you guys think? I know this chapter was a bit more angsty, but I'm pretty happy with how it turned out. Thanks for reading! And feel free to comment what you thought about this work!


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